


Are you death or paradise.

by Amandjnx



Series: CarolNat One Shots [4]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/F, Fix-It, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Sort Of, carolnat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-16
Updated: 2020-02-16
Packaged: 2021-02-27 21:14:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,822
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22762288
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amandjnx/pseuds/Amandjnx
Summary: Another CarolNat oneshot because I love them.Inspired by this tweet : https://twitter.com/WendyBattery2nd/status/1228703381302235136
Relationships: Carol Danvers & Steve Rogers, Carol Danvers/Natasha Romanov, Yelena Belova & Natasha Romanov
Series: CarolNat One Shots [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1669012
Kudos: 35





	Are you death or paradise.

**Author's Note:**

> Another CarolNat oneshot because I love them.
> 
> Inspired by this tweet : https://twitter.com/WendyBattery2nd/status/1228703381302235136

When Carol went back to Earth, four months after Tony's funeral, she didn't expect to come face to face with another person she thought died before the battle against Thanos even began.

But she didn't felt like before when she saw her. First, because the woman was back with her short blonde hair, the hair she had when they met and also, something she couldn't identify was making her stomach ache at the first sight of the usually-redhead, standing in front of the table of the meeting room with her colleagues Avengers.

 _This can't be possible._ "Natasha?"

The woman glanced at the other people in the room before looking right at the space soldier, "Oh, you must be Carol." she said stretching her hand to shake Carol's hand, who couldn't hide the surprise in her expression as the contact between them tightened even more the knot in her stomach.

"I.. yes, but you knew that, right?" she asked, hoping the Russian spy was messing with her.

"They didn't tell you?"

 _Tell me what? what_ _the hell happened_ _??_ "Apparently no."

"Long story short, I got dusted in Wakanda but my sister immediately found it out and took my place here, as she promised she would." Thinking about Yelena made Natasha emotional, she still had a hard time believing the younger woman died for her, "Steve said she told them that I ran away when I realised we lost, which I would have done honestly and she lived my life for five years."

"So, you are saying the woman I was friend with for five years is really gone?"

"Yes, sorry um-" she changed position, leaning against the table with her arms crossed to her chest, "Yelena promised me she would take care of my family in case I'd die and she did, even sacrificed herself for them."

Carol laughed at herself for the thought that came out to her mind, "I was going to say it was definitely Natasha's style but I actually don't know that."

"I would have done the same thing."

 _At least they have one thing in common, a tendency to suicide._ "I'm sorry, I will probably act weird around you for a while, just the time for my brain to adapt to the fact that you're not the woman I use to hug when I was sad."

"Oh, yeah, totally fine." Natasha assured, staring at the blonde with a soft smile, "If you ever need to talk.. um, about her or anything else, you still can come to me."

 _Well, she's even nicer than the Natasha I knew. What was her name again, Yelena?_ "Thanks, I'll remember that."

Before leaving, her eyes wandered around the room, looking for the other Captain but he wasn't there, "Anyone happens to know where Steve is?"

"Oh god, they didn't tell you that either." Natasha exclaimed, rubbing her temple.

"What? What the fuck is going on here?"

Bruce carefully stepped into the conversation, feeling Carol getting frustrated and irritated, "Steve was supposed to bring back the stones in their own timelines, remember?"

"Yeah and what about it?" she replied, showing them she was annoyed no information reached her.

"Well, he kinda decided not to come back and spent a life time in the past."

 _No. Fucking. Way. He did it._ "With Peggy." she said, it was not a question.

"Yes, he is still alive though, he's old and lives in a retirement home, he can go there with you if you want."

"No, it's fine, just give me the address, I'll go alone." she did a sign to Bruce, asking him to come with her before turning back to the exit. She threw a last glance over her shoulder to Natasha as she past the door. _Why does this feel different?_

~~~

Carol arrived at the old people's home and directly recognised the old man that Steve had become.

"I can't believe you actually did it." she said loudly to get his attention.

"Carol! What a good surprise!" he replied with a weak tone before standing up from his chair to greet Carol with a warm hug.

"You should have told me, for that and the fact that Natasha wasn't actually Natasha."

"I found it out a month ago," he explained as he sat back on his chair, inviting Carol to take a seat as well, "when she came back here, just like the others."

"How is that even possible? She got dusted in Wakanda, no one back there saw her when the Blip happened? And she didn't come to the battle when Strange did all his magic portals thing, what is she, a coward?"

Steve chuckled, it was the first time he heard someone saying that about the redhead, nobody ever dared to call her names, even on her back, "Nat is a lot of things, a coward ain't one of them. She said the Wakandian had built something where she got dusted, which happened to a lot of people. She was stuck there for days before they noticed, she almost died of starvation and dehydration, hopefully they managed to save her." he coughed, talking that long for a hundred-something years old man was hard, even when you received a super-soldier serum, "When T'Challa explained her everything she kinda freaked out and ran away for a couple of months, then she came back to New York in the new facilities."

"That's a hell of a story."

"It is." Steve was Carol's sorrow in her eyes, even if she was doing her best to hide it. He knew she hated gesture of supports, apart from Natasha's, well, Yelena's gesture, but he did it anyway, his hand reached Carol's to give it a gentle squeeze, "So, how was it meeting the real Natasha."

"I don't know, weird I guess?" she shrugged, taking her hand away from the table, and Steve's hold.

"I supposed as much." he said with a smirk.

_Should I tell him about it?_

The blonde woman got lost in her thought, not sure if she should open up to her friend or not.

"Carol?"

"Uh?"

"You didn't came here to yell at me and hear Natasha's story from my mouth, you could have asked her, what's going on?"

_I should tell him._

"I don't know how to explain it but um… I felt... different? When I saw her." she stumbled over her words, "You might say it's normal because it's not the same person but what I felt back there I experienced it only once before."

Steve raised an eyebrow, he thought he had guessed what she meant but wanted to be sure, "Maria?"

"Yeah."

"Well, it's not that complicated if you ask me, love at first sight."

"But that's the thing, it's not the first time I see her, or it kinda is but not really and I don't know what to do. My brain thinks I know her but in reality she's not the woman I think she is."

Carol was getting more and more angry, mostly against herself and Steve knew he had to say something to calm her down. After all, she could still learn to know the real Natasha, Steve was sure they could get along, if not more, "You forget something here Carol, she doesn't know you as well, it would be like discovering a new person for the two of you."

"A new person with the same physical appearance."

"Come on, Danvers, that's just a detail." he said laughing, amused by how childish Carol was acting, "Trust me, she's worth it, I'm sure you'll like her, you should take a shot."

"I don't know what I'll do about it yet, but thanks Steve."

"Anytime!"

~~~

Carol stayed at the new compound, sometimes doing quick scans of the areas around Earth but she never left for more than three days. Her mission with Talos was done and she wasn't really needed anywhere else in space, the Guardians were taking care of it, with the help of Thor, and would call her if her intervention was necessary.

At the Avengers facilities, she had her own bedroom, that she decorated with some old stuff she kept from Maria's house and the little she had left from her former room, a picture of her and Yelena (as Natasha) laughing like schoolgirls.

She remembered that night, they were with Steve and couldn't stop making jokes about the way he dressed, it was one of the best night she spent there. She missed it sometimes, when she wanted to go see Nat for a hug because she felt lonely, or when she made insides jokes the redhead couldn't understand because it wasn't her back then who made them.

It happened once, a few weeks after her comeback, that Carol forgot the Natasha in front of her wasn't her friend of five years and hugged her, only for a couple of seconds before pulling out, realising, in shock, that she hugged a woman she barely knew. Natasha didn't blame her for it, she understood it must be hard for her and it was actually nice to have some affection, even thought it was not meant for her.

Carol also had an office in the compound, a well hidden one, at the end of the corridor, so she always was the last to be bothered by any person who needed an Avenger to sign for this or that. Unfortunately for Carol, the long corridor didn't prevent Natasha from coming to see her, and she came a lot. The Captain wanted to avoid her as much as possible but Natasha's goal seemed to be the opposite, to see her every time she had a moment for herself. At first, it mostly bothered Carol and she showed it by replying roughly to any question Natasha asked her but, in the end, she let the other woman in and they shared a few good evenings, drinking wine as they took another look at a case they worked together. She had still some moments of weirdness and kept her distance, but she could say with pride that she liked the real Natasha.

Admitting her true feelings though, that was not something she planned on doing any time soon.

One night, Carol got surprised by Natasha visiting her as she was working late. She was not in a mood to see her, she felt weak and definitely not ready to talk.

The woman waited, leaning against the door frame with a soft smile on her face but Carol said nothing, she just glanced at her to acknowledge her presence before putting her attention back at her files.

"When you said you'd be weird around me for a while, I didn't expect it to be six months." Natasha said to break the silence, walking in the office and closed the door behind her.

"Sorry, I'm doing my best, I swear." Carol muttered, not lifting her nose out of the papers she was reading.

"I feel like there's more here than just you not accepting I'm not the person you thought I was," Natasha forced Carol to look at her, taking the files off her hands and tossed them on the chair next to her, "we've been talking a lot lately, I mean, you have an idea of whose the real me."

Carol sighed, this was just the conversation she didn't want to have right now, "Yeah, I do."

"So, why so weird, Danvers?"

_I wish I could explain but I just can't admit to your face that I love you._

Natasha was standing in front of her desk, her arms crossed and stared, insistently, and Carol had a hard time matching the eye contact.

She could have waited for a long time, but she wanted answers, she needed to knew why Carol was still uncomfortable with her, "And don't tell me you don't know, I've happened to get to know you too and I know you think, sometimes too much, so you must have thought about this."

"Nat, I don't know what to say." Carol finally spoke, joining Natasha at the other side of the desk. She kept a safe distance, just in case. _In case of what? I don't know, but I rather be far from her._

"Then show me."

"What?" _It's actually not a stupid idea._

"That's something Yelena and I used to do, when we couldn't find the right way to express what we felt, we would show it." Carol was stepping closer but Natasha didn't really noticed, "It usually ended up with a hug, or a punch in the f-"

She couldn't finish her sentence, cut short by Carol's lips on hers.

She should have seen it coming, but awkwardly, she didn't, or perhaps she wouldn't accept it, because it wasn't possible that Carol was feeling the same way she felt for her.

The feeling of Carol's soft lips plus her hand cupping her cheek sent Natasha to heaven and filled her heart with warmth and arousal.

When Carol pulled away, their eyes immediately met but she couldn't quite distinguish what was going on behind the emerald gaze, until Natasha pulled her into another kiss.

She felt a pair of strong arms being wrapped around her neck and did the same with hers around the shorter woman's waist, their body were pressed against each other's. Their mouths followed the same rhythm, as if they had done that for years, as if they knew exactly the way the other kissed and liked to be kissed.

The air quickly became an option they were not willing to take, they'd rather hold their breaths forever than break the contact between their lips.

When she found the opportunity, Carol slipped her tongue inside Natasha's mouths, earning her a moan from the other woman.

One of Natasha's hand was firmly fixed at Carol's shirt, grasping the fabric with her whole fist while the other was running in the really short naturally-blonde hair, sending shivers down Carol's spine. Carol's hands roamed all over Natasha's small yet toned body, sometimes up to the middle of her back, sometimes down to her ass.

The air around them grew hotter as their making out session lasted, but they simply didn't want the kiss to stop.

Natasha was amazed the situation had not escalated, yet Carol had some opportunities to lift her from the ground and carry her to her room, but she didn't.

The only sounds in the room was their breathy moans, coming mostly from the redhead when Carol's tongue invaded her mouth, just teasing her as she barely brushed Natasha's.

After longs minutes, and only because they needed to breath properly, Carol pulled away, resting her forehead against Natasha's to kept as much closeness as possible.

She heard Natasha giggle and decided it was the best sound she had ever heard, she wanted it in her ears more often.

"Guess I understand why you were so weird now." panted Natasha, breaking the contact of their foreheads to tuck her face in the hollow of Carol's neck, her right hand pulling Carol's head towards hers, so her chin was resting on her usually red hair. That was another thing she wanted to happen more often, having Natasha against her, letting her guard down in her arms, being no more than herself, Natasha Romanov, the actual one.

"Yeah, I've been told I'm weird when I'm in love." she admitted, not even scared that the redhead would freak out about such words.

"Took you some time to figure it out."

"Because you knew right away?" Carol asked with surprise, wondering for how long Natasha had liked her.

Natasha came face to face with Carol, the tip of her nose brushing the blonde's, "No, I just realised it faster."

"Who said I didn't realise it sooner? I just wanted to be sure I wasn't falling for the image of you, that I wasn't deflecting how I missed Yelena's personality on your physical appearance."

"Still, you could have realised that sooner." she repeated just to tease Carol, and it was definitely working.

"Blame me when you were sure of your feelings, I thought you were not a coward." she replied in a desperate attempt to match the teasing level of Natasha but she was better at it, she had learnt it during those last six months.

"I'm not, I just like it when people chase me."

"Fuck you."

"You could do that, yes." Natasha said instantly with her best flirty tone.

"I hate you!"

"We both know that's not true."

"Yeah, it's not."

Natasha chuckled, she loved annoying Carol and now she could do it as much as she wanted to, the other woman had no reason to be distant any more, and she didn't want to be.

"You wanna.. Leave that case for today and go to bed?" Natasha said with mischief in her voice.

"Cuddles before?" Carol asked innocently.

"I didn't say we would sleep, Danvers."

**Author's Note:**

> Work's title is a lyric from Billie Eilish's song for the next James Bond movie, No Time To Die.


End file.
